What do you want to be when you grow up? I suppose I’m all grown up now and yet I still can’t answer this question. There are so many paths to follow. You’re told all you need to do is choose one that makes you happy and success will follow. But what happens when you like more than one? You can’t fully succeed at more than one, each one of them will require your full time input into it for it to be “perfect”. But what does perfect mean? Does it even exist? Is there such a value each one of us deems it to be the “perfect” value? Is it the same for all or different? If it’s different how can it be perfect?
And there you have it, I’ve already derailed from the topic. It’s quite easy to get distracted nowadays. You have so many options, so many ways to learn, so many sources to choose from, so many things you haven’t seen, tried or experienced. And our human nature never allows us to be fully satisfied. Very few are happy with what they’ve got and appreciate it. The rest of us just want to know more, have more, be more. It’s a never ending cycle.
I can’t help but think that if I had put more effort into this or into that (fill in “this ” or “that” with anything), I’d be a lot better at it or make a career out of it. Then I realise it’d be probably too late to start now, although that’s only the fear talking. It’s never too late to do anything, right? But after spending most of your life going a certain direction it becomes hard to imagine having a change of heart for the rest of your life.
But then you think, I’m really lucky to have all these choices, I have privileges some can only dream of. Why am I throwing it away? So on top of you having all these options you also get to feel bad for having them, or for wasting them. You’re taking it for granted and not appreciating it enough.
Quite the irony, isn’t it?